Demon Slash or Rice Ball?
by Butterfly Bandage
Summary: I have been seriously bothered by Zoro's Onigiri attack lately. I don't know why. I just am. Sanji's point of view is now up.
1. Zoro\'s point of View

Name: Demon Slash... or Rice Ball?  
Main Characters: Sanji and Zoro  
Rated: PG-13 (bad language. cough cough)  
Dedicated to: My grandparents, who thought it hilarious when I pointed out 'Onigiri' means rice ball.  
Catagory: Humor  
Reason behind this fanfic: Zoro's Onigiri attack has seriously been bothering me lately. So I'm letting it out in this fanfic. Forgive me! I'm such a bad fangirl... I make fun of the attacks... sob

* * *

Zoro stared at the sky, disgruntled and angry. 

Damn pretty boy.

He shot a glance at the cook, and shifted his sword to the other hilt on his belt and started fiddling idly with it. Dammit. Roronoa Zoro and that... that... just the thought of him made Zoro's blood boil.

What right did he have, making fun of Roronoa Zoro's attacks, anyways? No one makes fun of his god damn French footsies. So it means rice ball, _big fucking deal_. It also means demon slash, so that damn pretty boy has no right to..

"_Augh_!" He grunted, fiddling harder. Stupid cook. No.

Damn cook.

He was fiddling so hard, he didn't realize the hilt came loose and cut his finger. "Dammit..." he muttered. He stuck his finger in his mouth.

Dammit, dinner would taste like crap now.

Not that he didn't like Sanji's food. He just never showed it. C'mon, why should he?

Damn. Wouldn't stop bleeding.

So what? It means rice ball. Don't see anyone else making fun of it. If it weren't for the fact that Sanji was on the team, he would have had the 'rice ball' sticking up his ass by now.

Damn it.

What was the _point_? _Why _was he on this crew, anyways? He was stuck with a laidback captain, a thief, an idoit liar, and that damn love cook, Sanji.

Why did he join this crew?

Maybe because it was just Luffy at the time? No, it was because he didn't want to get killed by that little _asshole _Helpemmo or whatever the hell his name was. His dream wouldn't come true if he was _dead_.

_Dammit. _Still kept bleeding.

Couldn't use his bandanna, either. Without it, he didn't look badass. And he _had_ to look badass, because then people wouldn't be as _afraid_. It was his trademark, dammit. He was a _pirate_, for god's sakes.

"Hey! Zoro! Get down here, it's time for dinner!" A voice interuptted his thoughts.

"Dammit, Sanji. I have dinner when I want," he muttered angrilly.

"Are you sure?" The cook smirked evilly. "We're having onigiri!" He practically flew into the kitchen to avoid Zoro's sword as it whizzed past his head. It stuck to the mast of the Going Merry and quivered.

"Dammit, what are you trying to do, you ass? Kill me?"

"That was the original plan, but scaring the hell out of you is much more fun."

"Bastard."

"Asshole."

"Retarded asshole."

"Dammit, just go back to your _god damn_ kitchen and and eat your _god damn_ riceballs," Zoro replied angrily. The cook shrugged and walked away. Zoro scowled and put his finger back in his mouth.

Dammit.

He continued thinking.

Now he made fun of Zoro's attacks _again_ by making the stupid riceballs. Asshole.

Dammit.

He felt his stomach rumble, and with a sigh, slowly walked towards the kitchen. Angry or not, he was hungry.

**END**


	2. Sanji\'s point of View

**Name: Demon Slash... or Rice Ball?  
Main Character(s): Sanji and Zoro  
Rated: PG-13 (cursing)  
Dedicated to: Again. My grandparents  
Catagory: Humor. You know us fangirls.  
Reason behind this fanfic: Well, I liked the one in Zoro's point of view, so I decided to write in in Sanji's this time.  
Disclaimer: Uh... well, I own an issue of Shonen Jump with One Piece in it... and... okay. No.**

* * *

Sanji stirred the rice with a look of disapointment on his face. What was Zoro's problem, anyways? So he made fun of some stupid attack... big deal.

Oi. Stupid swordsman.

Then Sanji smirked, stirring the rice harder. That put an idea into his head. Hewalked over to the cabinet and reached for some ingrediants.

This would get him going. Heh.

* * *

He finished his scheme and walked towards the door. He opened it and looked around. There was Zoro... sucking on his finger. Yeah... okay then. He stared for a moment, then shook his head to clear his head. He cupped his hands around his mouth and roused the swordsman from his thoughts.

"Hey! Zoro! Get down here, it's time for dinner!"

"Dammit, Sanji. I have dinner when I want,"Zoro replied with obvious anger.

"Are you sure?" The cook smirked evilly. Time to put his plan into action.

"We're having onigiri!" He widened his eyes, then practically flew into the kitchen to avoid Zoro's sword as it whizzed past his head. It stuck to the mast of the Going Merry and quivered where Sanji's head had been moments before.

"Dammit, what are you trying to do, you ass? Kill me?"

"That was the original plan, but scaring the hell out of you is much more fun."

"Bastard."

"Asshole."

"Retarded asshole."

"Dammit, just go back to your _god damn_ kitchen and and eat your _god damn_ riceballs," Zoro replied in rage.

Sanji shrugged and walked back to the kitchen.

Heh, it worked.

* * *

**Yup, that's it. Um... yeah. Reviews?**


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